personals

i will admit reluctantly that i have indulged a bit in online personals.  i have dabbled on and off for the past 3 years.  i cant say that i have been successful at finding love but i have met some amazing women...in person.  there may not have been a spark or simply we just werent right for one another at the time but i consider most dear friends.  in so many ways they have enriched my life.  regardless no love connection was had so i am back to looking...     

recently i updated my profile.  i have been a little bent at some of the snobbery that exists on one site in particular.  full of pomps and vanities it seems.  one doesnt deserve acknowledgment if one isnt A-list or model beautiful or wealthy.   actually ive experienced this in person at pride events.  the gays were so much more sociable than lesbians.  at least most have been up front enough on their profiles so that you are warned to go no further.  im really not kidding here.  occasionally where there is no warning up front and innocuous cursory hellos are rebuffed...bad manners are so unattractive.  

i also tire of the reading profiles that say...oh wait seriously a “match” just popped up on my email and she says THE EXACT words i was about to write...”i am honest and loyal.”   good for you honey but i hope fervently that those values are at the core of us all and do not need stating.  seriously.  maybe i am naive.  i get that not everyone trips the lighter side...but please.  i want originality.  i want someone who stands out of the crowd.  i want character. 

so the other day having reached my limit i decided to bluntly state what i look for.  i am most certain this will weed out those with he blank looks scratching their heads trying to figure out what i mean.  if she gets it and her values lie in a good time with money to blow cruising the circuit then she will reject me outright.  probably also those just looking for sex as well will think it is too much effort.  so this is what i ended up posting in the “about me” section of my profile...  

i care little if you tell me you are honest.  instead i want to know that you have honour.  the first is subjective and often fleeting...the second a hallmark of integrity.  

i care not at all for the size of your endowments earnings or financial accounts.  i care more for the richness of knowledge and experiences and relationships that you possess.   

i care little about how others have wronged you or life given you a bad lot.  i do care about how you’ve navigated these challenges and what you’ve learned and grown from them.   

i care not that you are connected socially or professionally.  i care instead that you engage those around you in a meaningful way...that your relationships with family and friends are rich and valued.

i am looking for interesting intelligent adventurous women for thought provoking social intercourse.  you must be willing to experience life...laugh easily...love generously and appreciate the gifts this world has to offer us.

please do message me if this describes you...

i dont know...maybe im the one coming off as the snob.  perhaps the years under me have grown me a little.  i havent the time it seems for ugliness or cattiness.  i had a dear friend who was a famous and academy award winning actor.  he took his own life through drugs.  we had many long talks about his struggles.  he could not sort out his true self...the one he desired the world to know from the artifice of fame.  at the end of the road when we look back...what is it that we will be able to take with us on the our next journey? 

i may never find my “match” online.  hell i may not ever find her irl either.  maybe the next will be another wonderful friend.  social networks are a funny thing.  i have in fact become more interested in growing the relationships ive made over the years with that select handful i consider my friends.  most i have never met in person or have done so just briefly.  i would like to remedy this.  strange how souls can connect in this virtual world.  i am looking forward to the goodness i have already reaped.  still like the patient fisher i cast out again and again hoping for that one elusive catch.